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We stepped into the house, the heat from the open fire hit my face. The cold had made my cheeks all red and blushed. It felt like an early winter back home in Sweden on the outside, and we were both happy to get inside. The lounge room and kitchen smelled like food. Which was much appreciated. Tim’s mum, who always was very happy and perky shone up when she saw us and wondered how my first day had been.

Tim: She got kicked by one of the chestnuts bastards…

Yes, this was Tim’s language. Bastards, idiots, cunts and so on, you get the point. He used these words after anything that had to do with the animals or sometimes even after a couple of people names. Not much of a gentleman this guy.

Tim’s mum almost started laughing but wondered how I was doing and if I was in a lot of pain.

For real? Was she actually laughing at me? I wasn't a toddler that just had fallen on my knees for the first time and wasn't sure how to react to the situation. I'd been absolutely wrecked by a furious, 600kg horse. This was not at all the reaction I thought I would get. Not that I wanted sympathy, but I didn't need anyone to laugh at me.

I shook off her reaction and said that I was doing fine. Explained what had happened and took the whole blame for it. We sat down for dinner which tasted amazing, she sure knew how to cook. Tim’s mum told me to take a hot bath after dinner, which I was tending to do.

The hot water surrounded my body and my legs was hurting even more now. They looked absolutely horrible. I had developed a major bruise covering both my thighs. I tried to relax but all I could think of was how to tell Tim that I couldn't stay. The room was cold, and soon, so was the water. I had to get out of the water and dry my hair before it froze. I literally jumped in to my clothes, three layers had to be enough! Dried my hair with the hairdryer. -Thank God for the hairdryers!

I called my mum through Viber, I needed help. I had no idea how I would do this.

"Hello!?"

I absolutely burst into tears. The day went as a re-play in my head.

"MUM, I need to get out of here!! It has been a horrible day! I can't do this! He have over 200 horses!! I've been kicked by one of them today! I'm in such pain! His mum even laughed at me when I came in!

Thinking back on it today I can imagine that I was probably sitting like Timon and Pumba in the movie Lion King, crying like a fountain as they do in the jungle when Simba meets Nala. But I also had to be quiet, I didn't know if anyone would pass outside my door and I didn't want them to hear that I was crying.

I spoke in 312km/h. My mum already knew that I wasn't happy when I arrived up there but that I was going to keep a positive attitude about it. Except, this was far from what she had expected when I called her. She tried to calm me down, break my way of thinking to make me think in a more positive way. But I couldn't, not at all.

"Can you at least make it through the week?"

"No, I can't. Not a minute more! And besides, he is leaving on Monday. He needs to find someone else who can take care of the horses instead of me. I need to get back to civilization so I can find another farm work. I can't even get hold of Tanja because of the bad reception!!"

I was devastated and frustrated. We decided that this was not the place for me and she would try to contact Tanja.

Dad called. Because I've already gotten out most of my frustration by talking to my mum I could speak more calmly with my dad. I explained the whole situation. I could hear how worried he was and determined he was to get me out of there.

"Maria, I will come down there and get you myself if I have to! Don't worry! We will solve this!"

Third call came from my brother. -"What is going on?? I just got off the phone with mum. Where are you? Give me the address so I can localize you on google maps. Are you okay? What have happened?"

Let me just take a minute here and write a bit about my family. I have a mum and a dad and three older brothers, which makes my whole foundation in my life. They are truly amazing people, just not only because they are my family but because of how they are against other people and how they are as human beings. They are all loving, kind, caring, cheeky, fun and up front. They'll give you black on white when no one else does. And they would go through hell and back to help people they love and sometimes people they don't even know. This small group of people are my everything. They are all great mentors, positive thinking kind of people and I always learn a lot from them. No matter how big or how small problem I have, they'll always be there. I would go through hell and back for them myself. I might not have much in this new country where I am, but I'll always have them. And that's all I need.

By "sort of" seeing where I was on google maps (Because Google had probably never been that far out in the bush to find my actual location) my brother understood the seriousness in the situation. We spoke for a bit, and also he said, just like my dad. "I'll come down there to get you myself if I have to. Don't worry!"

I knew they both would, nothing could ever stop them if this was going to be the case.

Forth call, Tanja. WHAT IS GOING ON?? I just spoke to your brother! What have happened?? Are you okay??

No, I was not okay. I told her the situation once again, and we tried to figure something out. Tanja didn't have a car so she couldn't come and get me. We honestly didn't know how to get me home. She was prepared to jump on the next train to get up to me and bring me home. But that was a 6h train ride and the train station was not exactly anyway near me. I told her that I would text another friend and see if he could help me out. We ended the phone call, somehow I would get out of there.

I texted a very good friend of mine, Harry. I knew that he usually started work early and finished off early. I told him the situation. And he told me that he would come and get me straight after work.

The whole world… No, sorry, let me rephrase that. The whole universe lifted from my shoulders, Harry was coming to get me. I just needed to stay the night...And tell Tim that I was leaving sometime during the day tomorrow.

I walked out to the lounge room again, and tried to find a way to tell Tim I couldn't stay.

Oh my God, I was so nervous and afraid. I just couldn't do it. I had given him some hints during the day, about me not knowing if I'd wanted to stay. I was praying that it had sunken in and I sincerely hoped that he had read between the lines.

I went to bed, absolutely exhausted. But because I still hadn't solved my last problem of telling Tim that I soon would be going home, I was tense and couldn't sleep. Everything was spinning in my mind. I finally decided that I just had to say it tomorrow morning, there was no easy way to blur this out. I just had to accept the situation and how it would evolve. I had to take it from there.

2 hours to go before everyone will wake up, please, please, fall asleep now. Just for a little bit.